22 October 2010

10min before

things can be change very fast every second
a words from someone can actually change your mind
a simple caring would bring up your day
ya...that is what i felt this few days when i back here
the land that i not sure whether i like it
but though i still need to be here....
but there is something that i could not ignore
is the peoples around here...
whether you have the burden?
what is burden for you?
what you wanna share about?
i guess that is the hardest things ever
life will never get simple if we don't think it as simple
it could be as hard as possible if you don't let it go
or you keep blaming yourself
keep depending on others...
of course no one can be perfect
even me....
but whenever i see my mum
i felt like i'm so useless
i could not help her at all
unless just stand beside her
she could just pretending strong
but she is fear.....
anyhow....i not sure what is it happen
even lots peoples told me...
there is GOd's will....
well i guess i understood those people feel down
or lost faith....lost direction
ya...i guess some moment i'm fall in that situation
i not sure what is the correct direction to goes on

over a night i mess up my room
and i just leave it like that...
even till now...
i don't know why....
well well well....lazy now....and pretending i don't see it
just let it be....
this condition just same as my heart...
mess like sand...you can't see anything inside....
u can just see the color...
 i hope to see the rainbow
cause that is the sign of God's love
unless i can sense His love...
and become confident again
or else no one can help me
unless me myself could stand up again
that is it....myself...
lots of advice from everyone...everywhere
which i used to gave to others last times....
i know how to tell others to do the correct things
but i don't know what should me myself to be
sometime i am thinking
human can just be so Fake....
just being so different from the inside out...

there is only a simple pray for me right now....
hope everything will be alright...fine
hope my mum's operation can be successful done....
she can recover fast
i can handle my life again
no more emotional breakdown...
cause...emo is the killer of joy!!!

too fat....need to reduce my weight now

12 October 2010

My Mummy

you will never predict what will happen next...
even me....even anyone....
but i believe that God will heal...
cause my mum body is the temple of God...
please pray for my mum too right!!!

and last sunday before my mum admit to hospital this morning...
my 1st time...donate blood...
to encourage my mum for her operation on coming week....

last.... i wanna say....
Mummy i Love you....
be strong and brave

CLicking

my life story start up